Childhood Guilt-I was Happy, My Family was Miserable
I didn’t know. I feel like I should have noticed.
When I was about 10 years old I thought my world was ending. Two years after that I was happy but no one else was.
It was Saturday, and my parents were fighting. My sister, brother, and I were all sent to clean our rooms while our parents tried to keep their yelling under control. My parent’s unhappiness was palpable, and I was crying intermittently while I cleaned my room.
Suddenly, my mom opened the door of my room. Her eyes were red-rimmed; she had clearly been crying, too.
“Your father is leaving.” She said flatly.
I didn’t know what she meant, “Where is he going?”
“He’s leaving for good!” She spat the words.
I didn’t know how to react. “Okay,” I said.
She left the room, slamming my bedroom door, and I sat there dazed. I knew how this was supposed to go. Our parents would sit us down and tell us they loved us but that they were no longer going to live together. We…